ANZACs vs CCC

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The Anzacs' team selection is based in theory on an exciting formula devised
by Satbir. It reads like this:

3*(attendance in practice) + Pi*(participation in team organization) -
0.5*(potential/ability) + integral sinx - differential cosx - C = 2x = YOU
PLAY

Where
x is a variable from 1 to infinity
C is a constant from 1 to infinity

Understanding the potential nightmare this could cause the selection
committee, the Anzac players have rallied supremely around the committee to
simply the formula to:

You're available = YOU PLAY

Upon satisfaction of this criterion, 11 players were selected for this
all-important game against CCC. Unfamiliar with this vague number, a
distinctly uncomfortable Anzacs team arrived at the field and were
immediately struck down to 10 players by Ronnie's last minute drop out. A
more comfortable team now meandered onto the field and surveyed the pools of
water all over. Ignoring the traditional 'You've got to be kidding me' and
'This is bull shit' from Simon, the umpire ruled that the fields needed to
be prepared for a 12:30 start. The fields were never prepared, but we
started at 1:30 anyway.

The Anzacs ended up batting first, the mechanics of which remain strange and
mysterious. Satbir and Harman started off cautiously against the Duke
lacquer....er.....cricket ball. Satbir departed early playing all over a
full ball and Shekhar followed soon after, LBW for making the elementary
error of playing forward and getting bat on the ball. This brought Simon to
the crease, and one can go to great lengths to describe the first ball he
played. He stretched splendidly to the pitch of the ball and his bat came
down in a perfect arc as he looked to blast the ball over long off. If only
bat had hit ball, there would have been considerable runs scored off the
shot. He put that shot behind him though, and ended up playing a very mature
(captain's?) knock. After Harman contrived to deflect the ball onto his
stumps, Sundar gritted it out with Simon for a while, before getting out to
a shooter. Sunil came and went LBW, once again for making the mistake of
playing well forward to a ball that was missing legstump.

Panda and Simon were going along well till Simon was done in be an excellent
delivery that swung from leg stump to hit the off. He finished with 25 runs,
which included a six over the bowler's head. Panda then had a brain fart of
enormous proportions and slogged at a full ball, popping an easy catch back
to the bowler. At 61/7, Sudeep entered and forged two breathtaking
partnerships - the first with Ketan for 2 runs, and after Ketan was out,
with Kartik for 7 runs, all before facing his first ball. Just as well, for
the first ball he played he was bowled neck and crop for a glorious duck.

Chasing 71 to win, CCC appeared pretty confident. Ahmed and Rajeev
negotiated Satbir and Panda, though not without the occasional hiccup. It
wasn't until Simon (he's all over this report, isn't he?) brought himself
into the attack that things really started happening. Ahmed played a ball
straight into the waiting hands of Kartik at short mid wicket and the stage
was set. Simon's second over was the turning point though, as 3 wickets
tumbled. The first wicket was Rajeev who spooned a waist high full toss to
Sundar to take a well-judged catch. The next ball was a perfectly aimed
shooter that crashed into the off stump before the batsman Prabhu could
react. Later on in the over Sanjay gloved a ball down the leg side which was
well taken by Sudeep.

All of a sudden, a victory was on the cards, and both the bowlers and the
fielders picked their game up a notch. Sundar was particulary notable on the
field, saving any number of runs at short fineleg. Sunil kept the pressure
up at the other end, and it got to Pranav who was bowled going for a big
hit. Simon trapped Arun plumb in front of the wickets, and CCC were on the
mat, needing another 32 to win with only 4 wickets in hand. There was a
brief moment of resistance when Shahid and Vijay kept the scoreboard moving
along, till Vijay tried to hit Simon out of the park but only managed to sky
the ball to Sudeep. 3 Wickets to go. Sunil put the match further away from
CCC by foxing Shahid with a vicious off cutter that shattered middle stump.
15 runs needed and only 2 wickets in hand. Sundar was brought into the
attack at this crucial moment, and he rose to the occasion, flighting the
ball fearlessly and having the batsmen in all sorts of bother. He got
Shankar with a perfectly flighted ball that ended up as a yorker. The last
pair needed to add 13 runs with all the time in the world. Instead of
playing it safe, they decided to go for their shots. It was a matter of time
before they popped one in the air. A couple of close shaves later Vanna did
just that attempting to finish it all against Sundar and Satbir made no
mistake at deep mid off.

Victory by 2 runs! Simon finished with figures of 6-3-6-6. The Anzacs
shamelessly piggybacked on his performance to get the win. Heck, he was the
only Aussie/Kiwi on the team and he was to do justice to the team's name.

A couple of interesting statistics will show just how close the game was:
Runs scored by Anzacs off the bat - 56. Runs scored by CCC off the bat - 55
Extras conceded by the Anzacs - 13. Extras conceded by CCC - 14
Boundary hits: Anzacs 1 six. CCC 1 four.

Little things make a big difference. In the end it was 2 runs. The Anzacs
forced a protesting Simon to join them for the after game beer. Simon ended
up bringing his date to the bar and introduced her to us, 'Guys, this is
Ann.'. Sudeep resisted the urge to ask, 'Which Ann?' and Satbir resisted the
urge to ask, 'What did he just say?'

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